Lena 4TF shrewsbury International school “The sapphire sea”

I made this story it is called the sapphire sea

There is a land that no human has discovered, this secretive land is underneath the sapphire blue sea it is called Atlantis.  First it was above the sapphire blue sea but then a devastating tsunami covered it and then 3 months later one person opened his eye and realized he can breath underwater and he had a tail, they called themselves merpeople. Then everyone started opening their eyes slowly and honored the first man as the king, he was called  Poseidon. Then Poseidon started to build schools for the merchildren,  four office for workers, one for cameras, one for furnitures, another for convenience store, and the last one for stationary and books.  There also toy shops and fanfare for merchildren to entertain themselves.  The city off Atlantis was very busy because the road was filled with mermaid, mermen, mercat, merdog and other merpets. The city was marvellous not because of the kind people or the building but because it was under ‘The sapphire sea’

Lena

Please leave comment below. ^_^

2 thoughts on “Lena 4TF shrewsbury International school “The sapphire sea”

  1. Dear Lena,

    I really enjoyed your creative story. You used excellent adjectives and complex sentence. Please can you check your work for plurals and simple mistakes.

    Mr Foster

  2. I had made the changes, it is below.^_^

    There is a land that no human has discovered, this secretive land is underneath the sapphire blue sea it is called Atlantis. First it was above the sapphire blue sea but then a devastating tsunami covered it and then 3 months later one person opened his eye and realized he can breath underwater and he had a tail, they called themselves merpeoples. Then everyone started opening their eyes slowly and honored the first man as the king, he was called Poseidon. Then Poseidon started to build schools for the merchildrens, four office for workers, one for cameras, one for furnitures, another for convenience store, and the last one for stationary and books. There also toy shops and fanfare for merchildren to entertain themselves. The city off Atlantis was very busy because the road was filled with mermaids, mermens, mercats, merdogs and other merpets. The city was marvelous not because of the kind people or the building but because it was under ‘The sapphire sea’

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